Ireland in One Fell Swoop

“Where’s the party at?”

This is a question we often find ourselves asking.

Zachary is tired. In Belfast, the party is certainly not at Zachary’s space.


Zebastian certainly is down to party, as am I. But we are only a party of two! We want more! More people! More beer! More everything!


Jamie and John, W.A.S's merch and light-tech men, respectively, have a pizza, and pizza parties are always fun, but this is not the kind of party we’re looking for. We want the crazy! We want the clean, wholesome fun!


Au Revoir Simone always know where the party’s at, but they like adult parties, and frankly, we’re not grown up enough for those.


We like parties with music!


And dancing!


Someday…

Someday…

As it turns out, Zebastian soon revealed that he had seen an old Irish woman hovering over Zachary’s bed the night we arrived in Belfast, and Zach was a shell of a man ever since… a curse! Fortunately, something had possessed Nathaniel as well, actually increasing his party aptitude, balancing out Zachary’s virtual disappearance and helping to maintain a net prosepctive party loss of zero.


For the duration of our first trip to Northern and Southern Ireland, the singer insisted on us calling him Shameless O’Drunky, and she spoke only in limericks.

There once was a boy from the bay,
With behaviors so strange friends would say,
“Shameless O’Drunky, you’re one bizarre monkey,
but I’ll drink with you here anyday!”

That kind of thing.

Galway was beautiful, and provided perhaps the best We Are Scientists show I have ever witnessed, and I’ve seen a lot of them lately. Keith was a combination of drunk, inspired, and hopped up on goofballs and held every one of the 225 people in the audience under his thumb for the duration of the set. (There is plenty of room for crowd surfing and dancing like a maniac under Keith's thumb, mind you.) It was pretty amazing.

Then we came to Dublin, where Nathaniel managed to exorcize Zachary of his malaise via a mixture of Irn-Bru and vodka he named the “Irn-Bru Fuck Ben Lee Handler.”


Through the power of this elixir, the old Zachary returned in time to rock the fuck out of Dublin, drink a shitload of Guinness, get in a fight with a bouncer, and set off some fireworks.


How we had missed him!

Other exciting things that happened in Ireland:

-Chalkie had a nice cry at a very emotional gas station.


-We partied with the inimitable Eddie Argos of Art Brut.


-We had cyber-sex with Keith Murray of W.A.S. while we were all in the same room.


-Nathaniel bled a lot, cried a little.


-We spent a very long time in the tasting lab at the Guinness factory.


-A certain someone had a very special day, but I’m not allowed to mention it here.


-We met a horse.


I love you,

Ben Lee Handler

Coming very soon: Kris's Korner - A new blog feature wherein Chris Cain will type about how he feels about me at any given moment. Or maybe something else. It's up to him, really.